


I'm Pregnant

by barsonaddict



Series: A Barson Baby [1]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-04
Updated: 2015-11-04
Packaged: 2018-04-30 01:28:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5145230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/barsonaddict/pseuds/barsonaddict
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Olivia has something to tell Rafael.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Pregnant

"Rafael- I'm pregnant." No, you can't just blurt it out.

Deep breath. 

"Ok. Rafi, remember how I've been getting hot flashes and mood swings well I thought I'd started menopause and we haven't used condoms in awhile..."

No, too much information. 

You are trying to psych yourself up for one of the most important conversations you will ever have. No pressure. 

Practicing in the mirror worked when you wanted to get your 'I love you' speech right, you're not sure why it's not doing the trick this time. 

"Rafi- this might not be the best timing, but I really think it's going to be a blessing."

"What's going to be a blessing? Who are you talking to?" You were so distracted you didn't even notice him come into the bathroom. 

You stand completely frozen, staring in the bathroom mirror, and in your peripheral vision can see your boyfriend leaning casually against the door frame. 

"Liv?" he pushes himself off the wall and moves behind you, wrapping his arms around your stiff frame, chin resting on your shoulder and looking at you in the mirror. 

You say nothing, but when you make eye contact and see how happy he looks, your eyes fill with tears at the thought that he might not want this, and leave you. All three of you. 

"Hey- what is it?" He questions as he straightens and gently turns you to face him. 

Your mind is racing with a million things to say- a thousand ways to say it that will soften the blow. 

"I'm pregnant." 

Or, you could do what you didn't want to, and just blurt it out. 

Too scared to look at him, you grasp his suspenders and curl into his chest, hoping that this will turn out alright. 

"You-you're- really?" 

You can feel his hands that were rubbing up and down your back move to your shoulders and gently push you away from him. 

You fight to stay close to his chest, but he says, "Hey, I just wanna look at you."

So you concede, and when he tilts your chin you look in his eyes and feel your heart break at the sight of tears in them. 

You lose the tenuous grip you had on your emotions and start to cry, choking out a reply. 

"9 weeks."

"Oh my god. I... How? I thought you..." He is clearly not taking this well. It's about what you expected, to be honest. 

El Tiburon, the workaholic lawyer, is clearly not looking to get into daddy mode, no matter how much he dotes on your son. 

"I'm sorry, I thought I was too- that's why I haven't been as careful the last few months but obviously I should have made sure."

You're not sure what to do, he's just staring at you; actually he's staring at your stomach like he has X-ray vision. 

A minute goes by that feels like an hour and he still hasn't said anything so you try to leave, deciding to get into bed and cry yourself to sleep. 

You will make decisions about your future tomorrow, tonight you will mourn your relationship. 

When you turn to leave the room it seems to break the trance he is in, and Rafael reaches for your arm, saying, "What? Where are you going? Why are you apologizing?"

You're confused. 

"Um- because I thought I was menopausal and wasn't, we should have been using birth control." You're so confused by his questions you are just answering on autopilot. 

"Exactly. We. This isn't your fault, Liv. There's nothing to be at fault for."

You stop and glare at him. "I'm pregnant, Barba. That's not nothing."

"Of course it's not noth-" he stops suddenly. "Are you not happy about this?"

"Of course I'm happy! I've always wanted a baby, and now I get a second one and it's all I've ever wanted! Noah is going to be such a good big brother!" Your angry tone doesn't match the beautiful words you are saying. 

"If you're happy then why are you yelling at me?" he's genuinely confused, and you think this is a fine time for him to get his Ivy League-educated head out of his ass. 

You stop trying to get out of his grasp and look at him again. 

"Because I wanted to do this with you, you asshole! Your child deserves to have it's father in it's life! You deserve to be yelled at!"

"Liv, calm down. We're not on the same page here," his calming tone is pissing you off even more. 

"Clearly," you scoff at him. 

"I'm happy."

Wait. "What?"

"I'm happy you're pregnant. I'm completely shocked; I never dared to dream this could happen, and I'm sorry I didn't say it right away, but. Liv. This is amazing." He says this looking right at you, tears in his eyes- happy tears?

"You're happy," you repeat. 

"Yes," he readily agrees. 

"You want to have this baby with me," you say, just wanting to be completely clear. 

"Yes," the smile on his face supports his story. 

"You realize this means I get everything I want for the next thirty one weeks, right?" No sense in sugar-coating it. You plan to enjoy this miracle. 

"Mi amor- you can have whatever you want, whenever you want it. That is my mission in life, from this moment on," he's still smiling, but looks serious about this. 

You both are still staring at each other. You don't know why you aren't in his arms yet. So you take his hand that is still resting on your forearm and use it to pull him to you. 

He stumbles into you, surprised, and apologizes, "Oh my god, Liv I'm sorry, are you okay? Did I hurt the baby?"

You laugh, thinking he's joking, but one look at his face makes you realize he's serious- and this is going to be a long seven months. 

"Rafi, I'm fine. Baby is perfect. It's going to put up with a lot more than that before it comes out."

You wrap your arms around him, tuck your nose beneath his collar and just breathe in his scent. 

"I love you," you murmur, barely loud enough to be heard. 

His hands are stroking you again, up and down your back, your sides, and up into your hair. 

"I love you too," he replies, just as quietly.


End file.
